Standing in the Middle
By Anthony Casperson
2-10-24
Pain and pressure pounded in my head. The world had that spin which accompanies a fall’s first split-second—except I was completely stationary.
While these feelings have become commonplace in my life throughout the past two weeks, I felt incredibly frustrated on this particular occasion earlier this week. Most of the times when I’ve felt this way have happened while I was doing light everyday chores, like doing a load of laundry or loading the dishwasher. (Moments when it was annoying enough to have them, but at least I could assign a reason for the sudden attack.)
But this time, I was just sitting there doing the research for an upcoming sermon.
I wasn’t even holding a book, or looking down onto one opened flat on the table, because I’d recently purchased a bookstand that worked very well. Everything was perfectly placed to accommodate my injured physical state. And yet my body continued to betray me. For no good reason.
Giving up felt like the best thing to do at the moment. But, once the wave of pressure and dizziness passed, I continued reading the commentary. And within a minute of reading, my gaze fell upon these words:
“Sometimes the clearest evidence that God has not deserted you is not that you are successfully past your trial but that you are still on your feet in the middle of it.” (From Dale Ralph Davis’s commentary on 1 Samuel, p. 200.)
My eyes blurred from tears before I got to the very end of those words. I had to stop my research for the sermon a second time. This time, not because of pained frustration, but because I needed to worship God in the moment. To just sit in the experience of God’s lovingly strong hand, despite the circumstances.
I wanted to shout praise for the reminder, but the words wouldn’t come. So, I sat in what would’ve been silence if not for the random playlist that rang out. And the words of the song playing at that moment broke into my silence. They were the chorus and bridge from Flyleaf’s All Around Me:
I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I’m breathing
Holding on to what I’m feeling
Savoring the heart that’s healing
Take my hand, I give it to you
Now you own me, all I am
You said you would never leave me
I believe you, I believe
The sense of needing to praise God while I stood in the middle of life’s difficulties only grew then. I felt God’s strength despite my weakness—something that I’ve been praying for. And could only lift my hands in praise.
Reach out to God as he gives you the strength to stand in the middle of the downpour of life’s difficulties. It’s the best response.
But it’s not an easy response. We remain in the midst of the storm, despite God’s presence. Yet when we reach out to our Savior, who’s close at hand, we’ll find him with us. And he is ultimately praiseworthy for that presence. (Even though we might not like being in that place of trial.)
One of the funny things about my circumstance this week is that David came to the same conclusion of praise while he was middle of the events that I was researching. While the situation was very different for David in 1 Samuel 19—hiding in his house while King Saul’s lackeys held a close stakeout of the location so that Saul could get ready to kill him—the same lifting of hands in worship erupted from David’s heart.
We know how he felt in the moment because Psalm 59’s title says this is the occasion when the soon-to-be king wrote the psalm’s words. He hadn’t escaped yet. And had no clue about what the future held. But he knew that God had power and strength. And that God was close at hand. So, David placed himself into the hands of God.
And the only possible response from David was worship:
But I will sing of your strength;
I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning.
For you have been to me a fortress
and a refuge in the day of my distress.
O my Strength, I will sing praises to you,
for you, O God, are my fortress,
the God who shows me steadfast love
(Psalm 59:16-17, ESV)
Succumbing to the need to praise God doesn’t mean that the problems magically go away. That moment in David’s life was the beginning of years spent as fugitive from Saul. And as of right now, I’m still having painful pressure in my head that sometimes make me feel dizzy.
But that doesn’t change the fact that God is with those who belong to him. That his protection and healing remain, despite the situation of his holy ones.
God’s strength is proven in the fact that we’re still standing while in the midst of the trial. Because without him, we’d have fallen long ago. The troubles of life leaving nothing but ashes and dust.
I don’t know what difficulties you’re dealing with. It’s probably somewhere in between suffering chronic pain and being on the hit list of a high-ranking political figure. However, since a person at both ends of that spectrum have lifted their hands in praise, witnessing the strength of God despite the circumstances, perhaps the best response would be to join us.
Reach out to God as he gives you the strength to stand in the middle of the downpour of life’s difficulties.
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